There are weddings you’re thrilled to attend and those you’re not as keen on. Let’s be real, it might be hard (and expensive) to attend every single one of them.
Before you go to the extreme and reply ‘Yes’ to all of your RSVPs, here are some situations that might allow you to skip the occasion completely:
1. When the wedding is so big that the couple won’t even notice you're there (or not there)
If the guest list seems like half the population of the country will be attending, you know that there is a high chance the bride and groom will not even notice you came. Of course, this depends on your relationship with the couple.
A simple way of testing this would be to ask yourself, “Will I be missed if I didn’t attend?” If the answer is ‘No’, then perhaps you can give this one a pass.
2. When you aren’t even close to the couple
This is a tricky one. If you honestly feel like you’re on the guest list for the sake of it or to ‘fill up space’, then you can probably avoid attending it.
Unless you think of it as a fun reunion or you want to keep in contact with the person, attending his or her wedding may not be a necessity.
3. When the person getting married is your aunty’s best friend’s cousin twice removed
Or basically someone you have never met or spoken to in your life. If you find that this is probably the first and last time you will see them, it's safe to say that it’s probably one wedding you won’t have to attend.
In fact, you’ll probably be doing the photographer a favour when he has to arrange the extended family for the family photo…
4. When it clashes with other pre-made plans or unexpected emergencies
If it happens to be on the same date as your vacation to Bali, it’s probably good enough reason to be excused from this one.
If you're finding it hard to decide, prioritise the weddings or events that mean more to you. For example, the ones involving close relatives, friends and family.
5. When you can’t afford to
If your friends decide to get married halfway across the globe, but you don’t have the budget to go even though you really want to - it’s okay to say “No” politely.
If they ask why, just be honest. Costs for these sort of weddings can add up, especially when you consider expenses for plane tickets, hotel rooms, rental cars, food, ang pows etc.
Ultimately, if you’re unable to attend a wedding for whatever reason, express your regrets and politely decline their invitation
Usually most couples will be able to understand. You can always give an ang pow or meet up for dinner after their honeymoon instead :)
Attending the wedding but unsure of how much money to put in your ang pow? We answer your most burning questions here: