Lost Tradition Or Lasting Legacy? The Role Of Extended Families In Malaysian Childcare
Are we at risk of losing the unique advantages of extended family support?
We are all familiar with the African proverb "It takes a village to raise a child". In Malaysia, it isn't just a proverb, it's a way of life.
This communal approach to parenting ensures that children are raised in a nurturing environment filled with love, wisdom, and diverse perspectives while also easing parental burdens.
Yet, in a world that is changing quickly and where urbanisation and contemporary lifestyles sometimes result in smaller, nuclear families, this cherished tradition faces new challenges.
Are we at risk of losing the unique advantages of extended family support?
In my opinion, the extended family is still an essential component of childcare in Malaysia amid recent developments. By providing emotional, practical, and cultural support, the extended family provides something that modern childcare systems may never be able to replicate.
The article outlines some of the aspects of extended family, the advantages it offers, challenges that they face, and explores how we can continue to keep this timeless tradition alive in modern life.
Undoubtedly, many Malaysians can recall fond memories of their grandparents, aunts, uncles, or cousins stepping in to provide a safe, healthy environment during their childhood
For example, grandparents take on caregiving duties while the parents are working, or aunts and uncles serve as mentors or provide a safe space for children to share their thoughts and feelings without the weight of parental authority.
For generations, grandparents, aunts, uncles, and even cousins have played pivotal roles in nurturing and guiding children. The extended family's contribution to childrearing goes beyond providing practical and emotional support; it also involves passing down cultural values, religious practices, native language, and traditions. For example, grandparents might lead the family in traditional festivals, keeping the cultural heritage alive.
This remains relevant today, as studies have affirmed that many Malaysian families continue to rely on informal childcare arrangements, for childcare such as those provided by extended family members.
Key advantages of having an extended family participate in childcare include emotional support, shared responsibilities, diverse perspectives, and strengthened identity
Emotionally, the child grows up in a nurturing environment surrounded by role models and adults who are always there to comfort and encourage them. There is more love to be shared.
Practically, they can share the burden of care with parents who may be finding it difficult to juggle between work and caring for their children. Their involvement contributes to the child's wellbeing by ensuring they receive all the care and attention. It can be as simple as an aunt helping them with homework or fetching them from preschool.
Moreover, extended family members aid the child in developing a strong cultural identity and sense of belonging. This may take the form of grandparents teaching traditional recipes, songs, or stories.
Extended family involvement positively impacts child development in terms of social skills, cognitive development, emotional intelligence, and resilience.
However, it is not without its challenges, such as conflicts, privacy issues, generational gaps, and differing parenting philosophies
As more families migrate for better opportunities, the physical distance makes hands-on support difficult. Differing perspectives between generations on how children should be raised could lead to conflict and sometimes, trying not to overstep boundaries can be tricky.
One way to ensure the continuity of extended family involvement in childcare is to make use of the technologies available today. Physical distance is no longer a barrier to regular interactions with video calls and instant messaging. Besides that, open communication is necessary to lay out some boundaries when it comes to childcare.
Another way parents can approach this is by practising hybrid childcare. Parents can drop their kids off at daycare centres and the grandparents can pick them up in the evening, making the arrangement work for all parties involved.
Our grandparents, uncles, aunts and cousins are the unsung heroes of childcare in Malaysia. In our quest to modernise, let's not lose the essence of community that defines Malaysian families.
In Malaysia, raising a child isn't just a parental duty; it's a family affair, and it's a tradition worth celebrating and sustaining for generations to come.
This story is part of the YouthSAYS initiative and is the personal opinion of the writer.
About the contributor:
Venisry Periasamy is a Master's in Developmental Psychology student taking Early Childhood Care and Practice course. She is passionate about exploring family dynamics and childcare practices.
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