Woman Demands RM20,000 Dowry & RM5,000 Condo Deposit From Her Fiancé Before Their Marriage
"I can only imagine what else she's gonna make noise about after we get married," the confessor said.
By Wayne Garreth — 13 Apr 2023, 11:07 AM
There's no such thing as an easy pre-wedding preparation process — but let's just say that some people may have it much harder than others
A recent confession made to the Twitter page TwtWedding has gone viral after one man anonymously expressed his frustrations about his future wife. Divulging on issues related to their relationship, the man conveyed that he is confused as to whether or not they should get married.
Providing context to the situation, the man gave a few examples regarding her behaviour that has made him question the legitimacy of their relationship, and the bleak possibility of their future.
"The first thing is that she wants a dowry of RM20,000, and this is before the cost of the ring and additional costs related to the wedding ceremony that she claimed she would top up," he stated.
Adding to the problem, he also stated that she wanted him to solely put down the deposit for a condominium they're planning to get together. For the four bedroom apartment, the estimated cost of the deposit would be RM5,000, according to the confessor.
To make matters worse, the confessor carried on by mentioning that his fiancée does not have a stable job and doesn't plan on getting one either, using the excuse that she's ready to have kids
Explaining his financial situation, the man stated that he currently earns RM3,000 a month, and tried to reason with his fiancé to get her to pay the remainder RM2,000 for the condo deposit. Unfortunately, the conversation did not go smoothly.
"I told her that we should share the cost of living. I'd faint if I had to pay RM5,000 per month. She grumbled at me, said some things, and complained saying that she doesn't want to pay the RM2,000. I can only imagine what else she's gonna make noise about after we get married," he added.
The confessor stated that his frustrations have been mounting, as even without handling these issues that have arisen before the wedding, he goes on to say that his fiancée has already started discussing matters relating to the potential of having children.
Ending his confession, the man asked for advice from the general public, saying that he'd rather run off with a girl from Thailand to make things easy for himself at this point.
Garnering a major response on Twitter, many people chimed in with their thoughts over the situation and what the confessor could do moving forward
The vast majority of responders told the confessor to leave his fiancée and find another partner for his own sake.
"At this point, she should be committed to you because she loves you. But here, you said that she doesn't even spend a single cent and is not serious to work or support her family. There's no intention to do things together. You deserve a girl who wants to build with you, not some freeloader," said one user.
Another user told the confessor to list down all the expenses it takes to build a family, saying that if she refuses to understand how taxing it'll be for them to live the lifestyle she wants, he should leave her.
Offering some counsel, one user told the confessor that he needs to be direct with his fiancée about not having the funds to fulfil her requests.
"Tell her what you can afford and what you can't. If she still wants to argue, then you should find someone that you can afford to take care of," they wrote.
Adding some concrete facts to her reasoning, one woman told the confessor that they shouldn't get married until they figure out their financial situation.
"Please note that the number one cause for divorces in Malaysia happens over money," she said.
One user, however, took a different route when giving advice to the confessor. In his remark, the user said that he is weirded out by parents who ask for expensive dowries.
"Their child also has her head in the air and doesn't care about anything. Remember son, you have to avoid it. If not, you'll be in ruins in the future," they opined.
Giving diverging opinions, one Twitter user stated that while they believe wives should not be forced to work, they do have to feel empathy towards their husbands
"Wives do not have a responsibility to work, and her money is her money. But brother, it's very important that you live with someone who has common sense and will show you compassion. If this is how she's behaving already, imagine how she would act if you hit rock bottom," they wrote.
Providing fruitful advice, one user gave her take on the situation, explaining that when she got married, her husband did indeed pay her a RM20,000 dowry, though he was in a stable position to do so.
"But other things like my wedding garment, I paid for it myself. My ring and dowry, he paid for it — his ring and dowry, I paid for it. Even after we got married, he does pay for the bills, water, WiFi, and food. However, in the middle of the month, I will treat him here and there too. It's about give and take," she said.
In a separate instance, one mother forbade her daughter from getting married simply because her older sister is still single:
